Today has been an interesting day here at Anodyne at least on a personal level. While the women in our crew were engaged in Divine Feminine, which is broadly speaking a group where issues pertaining to women are discussed, I wrote some poetry about my experience as an Indian American trying to fit into the Indian community. (I will post this on Globalphreak, my other blog.) I also began writing the genesis of a anti hindu nationalist poem. (I will also post this on Globalphreak after some tweaking. I know it’s inviting some possible controversy but it’s all appropriate language, no crude inflammatory language or swearing…and it’s my honest opinion, one which I believe is shared by many.) I then got to share my poem, and my thoughts behind it. This was a most illuminating experience. I got to get down to the bottom of my identity issues and I realised that it was not so much about race, or even culture, but my status as a disabled person encapsulated within the context of culture. I learned a lot about the universality of humanity, which sounds so abstract as to be corny, but it really got me thinking about one critical thing: What does race and culture have to do with it? is there an exclusivity to the question of identity? That is to say, are race and culture the only things I should be judging my life by? How ‘white’ I am? how ‘Indian’ I am? Of course not! And as for some of the behavior exhibited by people I’ve met, I’ve no doubt there may be some cultural factors in some of it but after today, I’ve taken into consideration the fact that, say, getting the cold shoulder from someone after saying they are interested in being with you is of course a human thing. I was told, I’m giving this cultural stuff too much power. Not to say there aren’t barriers but it has more to do with the disabilities aspect than anything else…that being said, I also got some great advice after someone noticed I was in a weird mood. They said that when they get so wrapped up in themselves, they remember the things that are happening outside of themselves that are far greater than whatever it is they are worrying about and to feel gratitude for what they do have.
As a result, I feel that oddly enough, Anodyne has solidified itself within me as a true home away from home. I now know that this is a place where there is truly no judgement and everyone is there to support each other in art, and in life.
ACtors Rehearse: Acting with disabilities. 